Quotes heard in Edinburgh

In Collections, Quotes on April 16, 2012 at 7:40 pm

It’s been a while since there’s been a nice long list of quotes, and there were some particularly fine ones that I heard in Edinburgh.

  • “Parliament’s in recession” Trying to book onto a tour of the Scottish parliament, he meant recess. Would you believe he’s an economist?! It wasn’t some random person, it was my dad, which is why I know all this stuff.
  • “He’s going to have to have his teeth fixed before he goes.”
  • “I’ve got a bloody eye because I threw a key into it.”
  • “You’re getting a council flat at 25?”
  • “Was he on the dole at the time?”
  • “She’s on drugs because her baby was taken away from her.”
  • “I’ve heard a rumour that people are let out on day passes.”
  • “I’m not being snobby in any way, shape or form.”
  • “George very kindly kept the last copy of the News of the World.”
  • “He sounds funny, I’d like to meet him actually. Is he very Bulgarian?”
  • “I have zero gaydar.”
  • “Four brothers married to the same woman.”
  • “Beware of women who use too many exclamations(!)”
  • “We could always go for a quick lap dance.”
  • “We’ve got all these breast shaped mountains.”
  • “It’s like a man having symmetrical bollocks.”

The vast majority were said by two people sat at the table next to us in a restaurant, it was very hard not to laugh hysterically at some of the things they said…

And then my favourite quote from today…

  • “I don’t want to have a conversation with a woman that includes the word placenta.”

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